What Is The Secret Of Love?

[scionic]

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True that.

I've gained a great deal from that book.

It's far more helpful for maintaining a relationship than it is for finding one though.

Good read though, just the same.

[Demonic Angel]

I have Mars & Venus on my bookshelf too!

Other good reads include:

Why men dont listen and women cant read maps and Why men lie and women cry both by Allen & Barbara Pease...... very good books!

[Fidgits]

wow.... you lot really are suckers arent you????

Maybe I need to write a book then I can seperate you all from your hard earned cash....

at the end of the day - relationships all boil down to common sense...

[JustJJ]

Common sense and whether or not you are just plain and simple attracted to each other.

They could be the best looking person in the world, but without some sort of personality they generally wont get very far. Vice Versa also works....

You gotta have a little bit of everything. Nice guys dont often finish last, they dont often finish first either. It depends upon the nice guy in question.

The main thing is just to be who you are, people will ultimately love you for it, and respect you for it, and hey, you wont feel unhappy in yourself that you had to change to suit someone else.

Men and Women arent all that difficult to understand... you just gotta have patience and be a little laid back. It'll come.

Ok... I guess I'll go back to my own contemplations now...

ttfn

[dicey2k]

JJ - Have you ever thought about becoming a philosopher? :D

[alanbradley]

I thought she already was

[JustJJ]

Hehehe... nope... not really... I just say stuff how I see it mostly...

I dont think Philosopher pays well enuff for an MR2 tho ;)

[Fidgits]

I thought she already was

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you were just imagining her in a toga...

Go on, admit it :P

[Blue84]

Dont go looking for love - love comes looking for you!

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Amen to that

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Amen to that from me too :D

[scionic]

wow.... you lot really are suckers arent you????

Maybe I need to write a book then I can seperate you all from your hard earned cash....

at the end of the day - relationships all boil down to common sense...

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Maybe you should read one of the books before you dismiss them offhand without knowing what you're talking about, eh?

[Bibbs]

wow.... you lot really are suckers arent you????

Maybe I need to write a book then I can seperate you all from your hard earned cash....

at the end of the day - relationships all boil down to common sense...

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Maybe you should read one of the books before you dismiss them offhand without knowing what you're talking about, eh?

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I've gotta agree with Ian (fidgits) .. there are too many of these self help books out there telling us what the author thinks we should know.

At the end of the day, in a relationship be open and talk to the other person and LISTEN to their answers.

I didn't need to buy a book to learn that, but all of you who have read it owe me a fiver ..

[Fidgits]

yeah, and scionic - if you read my posts above, you can tell I dont need to read those books at all, because all they will tell me is what is already common sense.. very similar to what Ben mentions...

[knowlson]

After recently becoming single, in the last 2 weeks I have had a lot of time to reflect on what I did in the 6 years we where together and you know what I would not change a thing You learn by doing not by reading some book about love chirst.

If you cannot talk to someone or be yourself then whats the point? If you click with somone then thats cool if people dont get you :censor: em Talking is great it's how we get to know people.

Dont go looking for love let it come to you it will happen when you least expect it and hopefully knock you off your feet. I thought I had it but I have lost it for the moment I am sure at some point in the future someone will come along and I will fall in love again... Not just yet mind I am too busy having fun and living my life if you get worked up thinking you will never get someone you wont. Take it as it comes ;)

Now off to the toilet as I have made myself sick

[Bibbs]

Amen boys.

It's all about being yourself and finding someone who likes that. And visa-versa.

I'm in "the Zone" at the moment as I like everything about the current woman and she's the same.

It's all trial and error peeps. I'm only 27 and still learning things everyday. I expect I'll keep learning till I'm dead.

[urotsukidoji_badassdemon]

Just being yourself is the best way to get yourself netted. I unfortunately am too good for my own good, and a bit greedy too. I don't wanna boast, but I got a few too many female associates now. Luckily, they aren't too close to be able to see everyday, but not too far away to go and see, so they won't come to see me. i just go see them if and when i desire some company, otherwise, I just talk on the fone to them, and keep them happy.

God, I hate it when I can get the girls off on the fone and I ain't with them in person!!! I HATE that!! But it can be fun. Listen for the squelching sounds they make!!

Girls love to be made to laugh. And some of them, or is it all of them?? like to WIN an arguement, luckily for them, I don't like to argue, so I say I let you win, they laugh, and we just carry on.

Unfortunately for me tho, I already have a steady girlfriend who's gota GREAT bum, but am seeing another girl far away who thinks I am single, and 1 girl who really really loves me, and sotr of seeing another girl who I think wants to marry me. So you see, be your self, and you may just end up digging your own grave!!!

If you do feel a bit greedy tho, do as I do, and have thme live far enough away so they DON'T want to travel the distance all the time to see you, just now and again, so you can juggle each girl every week or so. That way, you end up being REALLY happy. Just make sure you don't get the days mixed up tho!!!.

So,

rule 1, be yourself, don't try to be something you are not. If you are naturally shy/loud, then don't try to be the opposite, it CAN backfire on you.

rule 2, having a sense of humour would gain big brownie points.

rule 3, tell the truth to everything!!! ( this does NOT apply to me, all my girls think I am single,except mygirlfriend of course!)

rule 4, try to relax, take your time, and don't rush things.

rule 5, being best friends is better than not having them as a friend at all. That means if they don't want a relationship, then just having them around can help you to relax around girls, and eventually lead to others.

Good luck.

[Caz SR]

One question - why do you even bother having a 'steady' girlfriend if all you want to do is play the field?

At least give her the respect she deserves and let her find someone who will treat her better - not a bloke who boasts about cheating. It's not big and it's certainly not clever. <_<

<BACK ON TOPIC>

May I suggest you try and forget about finding 'the one' and concentrate on yourself for a bit? Although it seems a cliché, everyone is right - it will turn up when you least expect it.

Take up more social activities, go to meets and have a laugh doing so. Your personality and honesty will catch someone's eye :)

[urotsukidoji_badassdemon]

Actually Charis, it wasn't my intention to play the field, just I have a knack of clicking with girls init. Some ppl are just like that init, able to talk to girls without having to think about it. In my case however, I like to, as one person once said, keep my options open.

And it just happens that the girls I talk to and am having relationships with don't live ' just round the corner '. it's just my luck I guess that they don't, so I CAN do what I do. It won't hurt anyone if no-one knows init. I know it may sound heartless, but treat them mean, but keep them keen. Not that I treat them badly, I am very affectionate towards all my female acquiantances, thats why they like to talk to and be with me. :P

Anyway, to the guy who is having trouble finding a lass, try to relax, let things be, and for all you know, the next person you see may just be looking in your direction. But just keep it to one lass eh mate. For now.