Long Distance Relationships

[Rookey]

Why is it that they never work?

I know its a broad question but I just been stung ..

[gordypix]

Out of sight - out of mind.....................

[Blue84]

They don't always never work!

Take me and Yves - I'm in Essex, England and he's in Belgium so yep we are long-distance and it works for us..it's hard not seeing other but we manage..so yup real example of a Long-Distance Relationship between two TOC members here..and a very much surviving one too.

Whats happened to make you get stung tho?

[Demonic Angel]

I tried long distance..... twice! But it didnt work out either time!

First guy lived in Bolton and we split up because he had personal problems which he felt he couldnt talk to me about and ended up dumping me (turned out he'd just found out he was adopted and his ex-girlfriend had just given birth to his child that he didnt know existed - he didnt tell me this - a mutual friend did! He thought I would peg it if I found out about his daughter, which would sooo not have been the case!) We talk occasionally on MSN, but not really in touch with him

Second guy lived in London and things were going well until I heard on the grapevine he was doing the dirty on me - I confronted him and he just said "Well maybe we should just leave it because I dont think things are working out" so we left it and then I met Rich, so it was a blessing in disguise!

I think it depends on the people involved in the LDR - you need a lot of trust and if you've been hurt many times before (like me!) its hard to trust someone who you only see at weekends!

[Calisto]

MMMMM long distance...... ok so maybe I am not thousands of miles away from my other half (he is only an hour and 45 mins from me) but at times it certainly feels like it. I really dont like being so far away but at the same time I like my space.

We have been together for 9 months and are as strong as ever. :) And I will accept that sometimes it is hard to keep the relationship going, and the distance is an issue, but if you want it to succeed then you have to make the effort. If you have something together that you know is good you will move heaven and earth to maintain it. :group-cuddles:

And like DA said trust is a big issue, I get insecure about this and that, but I know deep down that he would never cheat on me.

Ash.

[Rookey]

Ah well my ex moved away to Norway .. been cool, then out of the blue I get an email saying its over ..

Maybe she found someone else ..

Oh well .. shizz happens!

[Calisto]

Ah well my ex moved away to Norway .. been cool, then out of the blue I get an email saying its over ..

Maybe she found someone else ..

Oh well .. shizz happens!

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Ahh Hun I feel for you mate. Were you in the relationship long?

[Chappers]

Oh well .. shizz happens!

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Amen..

Depends what you want from the relationship... Some can stick it - others cant. :(

[Calisto]

I think it best to find out what you both want from the relationship, find out if your both going in the same direction or maybe it was a wait and see kind of thing.

[Rookey]

Ah well my ex moved away to Norway .. been cool, then out of the blue I get an email saying its over ..

Maybe she found someone else ..

Oh well .. shizz happens!

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Ahh Hun I feel for you mate. Were you in the relationship long?

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Nah, that's the thing, usually I couldn't really give a crap, but this time it was different .. and it sucks .. slightly :P

Now time to go out and get pished and lick some random women's faces! ;)

[reece]

It never works... not known one that has any length of time.

[famz]

It never works... not known one that has any length of time.

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i disagree strongly, iv been in a long distant replationship for FOUR YEARS now, im in bradford, hes in leicester. i c him once every 4-6months for afew hours cos of uni and work. its VERY hard words cant describe how difficult it is for both of us n yes i wudnt recommend it, but when u in love u hav 2 make the effort. we trust each other truely 2 the max and each time we see eachother its like the 1st time, like thy say DISTANCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER. :group-cuddles:

[starletsr]

They don't always never work!

Take me and Yves - I'm in Essex, England and he's in Belgium so yep we are long-distance and it works for us..it's hard not seeing other but we manage..so yup real example of a Long-Distance Relationship between two TOC members here..and a very much surviving one too.

Whats happened to make you get stung tho?

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!Removed! mad people!!

[famz]

They don't always never work!

Take me and Yves - I'm in Essex, England and he's in Belgium so yep we are long-distance and it works for us..it's hard not seeing other but we manage..so yup real example of a Long-Distance Relationship between two TOC members here..and a very much surviving one too.

Whats happened to make you get stung tho?

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you go girl, i know the feeling

[scionic]

They don't ever work because they are totally illogical.

A romantic relationship by its very nature means spending time TOGETHER and being intimate. Those are the cornerstones. A LDR is like a building with 2/3 of the foundation missing. It's only a matter of time until it collapses.

What Gordypix says is true as well. Out of sight out of mind. As time goes on inevitably one person or the other will begin longing for what's missing in the totally incomplete relationship and will either decide the misery is too much, and/or will go looking for that fulfillment locally.

They just don't make sense.

Knowing that, I had to make a painful decision when I left my g-friend behind at college in Vermont. She wanted to continue on, but I knew I'd be moving to DC and working and she'd be there for at least another year and a half. There were other reasons involved, but the main thing was, I knew it made NO sense. It would be no kind of relationship, so I broke it off.

Don't do it people.

[starletsr]

They never work out, cheating and all sorts happen, i know someone that is seeing 4 girls at once, lol.

[scionic]

They never work out, cheating and all sorts happen, i know someone that is seeing 4 girls at once, lol.

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Totally.

I'm surprised to hear adults attempting them. I thought it was the sort of thing only teenagers beleive is actually going to work in the long run.

I guess if you're a celibate and emotionally detatched person married to their career it could work, but if you want anything out of a relationship more than phone s*x and valentines cards it's a stupid move.

[Karma Supra]

I once had a Dutch model that fell in love with me over the internet

I assumed it was a wind up and she was a troll, untill after about a year of her pestering me (ad sending interesting photos ;)) I told here where to get off... she then moved onto someone else know... turns out it really WAS her in the pics!!!

:ffs: :censor:

Sorry to hear that Dave :(

[Rookey]

I once had a Dutch model that fell in love with me over the internet 

I assumed it was a wind up and she was a troll, untill after about a  year of her pestering me (ad sending interesting photos ;)) I told here where to get off... she then moved onto someone else  know... turns out it really WAS her in the pics!!!

:ffs:  :censor: 

Sorry to hear that Dave :(

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Cheers mate, im absolutely pished now and have a new girls number so should be ok ;)

[LORD_ED]

didnt know u were in a relationship mate, if u want someone to lick womens faces with dude give me a shout ~(different women not same time, i know what urock n roll types r like)

[Blue84]

They never work out, cheating and all sorts happen, i know someone that is seeing 4 girls at once, lol.

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Totally.

I'm surprised to hear adults attempting them. I thought it was the sort of thing only teenagers beleive is actually going to work in the long run.

I guess if you're a celibate and emotionally detatched person married to their career it could work, but if you want anything out of a relationship more than phone s*x and valentines cards it's a stupid move.

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Okay you have annoyed me by that :ffs:

So does that mean i am a celibate and emotionally detached person married to their career?? Nah don't think so somehow - not any of those.

You don't choose who to fall in love with, it just happens - and yes like I said it isn't easy but is any relationship truly easy in the long run?

A romantic relationship by its very nature means spending time TOGETHER and being intimate. Those are the cornerstones. A LDR is like a building with 2/3 of the foundation missing. It's only a matter of time until it collapses.

Yes you can't be together as much as you want, but it doesn't mean it never happens either - you make the most of the time you do have together, Famz knows the feelings. I know I won't be cheating either.

[scionic]

Okay you have annoyed me by that  :ffs:

So does that mean i am a celibate and emotionally detached person married to their career?? Nah don't think so somehow - not any of those.

You don't choose who to fall in love with, it just happens - and yes like I said it isn't easy but is any relationship truly easy in the long run?

Talking to someone on the telephone, sending email and seeing them from time to time isn't really a relationship, now is it? It's an e-friendship.

Yes you can't be together as much as you want, but it doesn't mean it never happens either - you make the most of the time you do have together, Famz knows the feelings. I know I won't be cheating either.

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It's not generally the girl that cheats. They are the ones with the unrealistic romantic notions that lead to a purely emotional decision like attempting an LTR in the first place.

It should make no difference what I think though. It's your own insecurities that probably upset you, not the opinion of a stranger on the Internet.

Don't mind me. Everyone here knows I am dark and evil inside.

[Blaze]

It all depends who its with!

If its with two people who genuinly love each other then it may work, if one of them is only half hearted then it simply wont work!

Blue84 show 'em how its done! :P

[scionic]

True.

If you find a man with low testosterone and a weak s*x drive I'm sure he could remain faithful for months at a time without losing his mind.

Blue, Just make sure Yves only takes his Viagra when he's back in the UK.

[Red Yaris 54]

True.

If you find a man with low testosterone and a weak sex drive I'm sure he could remain faithful for months at a time without losing his mind.

Blue, Just make sure Yves only takes his Viagra when he's back in the UK.

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I think with comments like that it is just as well that you are over there and we are over here.

Please learn some respect for other people and their feelings